Creepin' AKA Cheatin' AKA The Relationship Felony

What’s good Fam? I’m feeling fabulous and I’m just coming off of a very dynamic week. Let me tell you this, if you’re not getting what you want out of life, then make some new choices. That’s what’s up.

The weather here in the ATL has been great; it truly feels like spring… I take that back, this weekend felt more like summer for real. It’s beautiful to wake up and see near clear blue skies and feel the rays of the sun when you step out the door. It feels great to be outside on the block chopping it up with my people and making money in the process, no doubt.

Now, if I could just get over this damn pollen… Georgia has so many trees letting off so much pollen it gets off into your throat and eyes and it’s extremely irritating if you have allergies.

For those who read last weeks post about me being indecisive between two young ladies I figured it was time to give you all a quick update on the situation. But first let’s take care of the business…

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Alright, back on point… After weighing the situation out between both Mz Tam and Mz Lonnie I looked at things from the perspective of what I want and what’s best for the long term. Mz Lonnie is all of that hands down. She’s intelligent, takes care of business, she’s a good mother from what I’ve seen and also just a joy to be around. She’s also beautiful and possesses quite the Badunka Dunk; the kind that would bust out of some Apple Bottom Jeans if you’re following me. I like my asses big, what can I say?

Mz Tam didn’t take the news so well. I had a face to face conversation with her about my decision and at first she said she really didn’t care but as we continued to talk she didn’t overstand (stand over not under) why I didn’t want her.

Tam has some bullshit around her and I just can’t have that in my cipher (circle). I don’t think she really saw my perspective which is cool, she doesn’t have too; just as long as she respects it.

Decision made. I’ve locked it down with Mz Lonnie and have no regrets in my choice. Mz Tam has made it a point not to keep in contact with me which is what it is. When you gain one thing, you lose something else.

My moment of indecisiveness does bring up something that one of my homeboys is currently going thru. He’s a younger dude, about 22 and is actually a neighbor of mine. His girl is a friend of my EX, Mz Mental, so we became cool through them. Now my boy Cee is a good dude. He works hard, takes care of home (he paid all the bills for months when his girl wasn’t working and took care of her daughter too), and generally stays on top of his business.

Me and Cee used to chat from time to time but since I’m hardly ever home there was a little distance put between us. Mz Mental, my EX, came at me one day with that big-eyed look on her face.

“Guess what happened to your boy?”

“Who?” I asked.

“Your boy got caught up!” She responded and then she proceeded to tell me the whole story.

Long story short… Cee has an EX girlfriend that he was creeping with over the weekends. He would tell his girl that he was over his mother’s house when he would really be over his EX’s. To make matters worse, he wouldn’t just go see his EX, he would spend the night. How he got away with that for so long I couldn’t tell you, I never asked. Listen Fam, I’ve had some relationship misdemeanors in my lifetime but that’s just a relationship felony as my homeboy J would call it, you feel me?

Anyway, the EX got in contact with his current girl and they talked on the phone and eventually met face to face. Oh boy… bad business. Mz Mental was there through it all so I had a first had account of what went down next. Two hurt black women, it was on and poppin’ to say the least.

Cee’s EX and his girl teamed up to confront my boy face to face. Sort of a surprise tactic, they wanted to catch him off guard. Now damn… why did my boy have to be home that night? They both rode up, went into the house, marched upstairs and busted through the bedroom door where Cee was sleeping. I could just imagine the look on his face!

Mz Mental took current girl’s daughter into her room across the hallway while the two ladies just verbally let loose on Cee. Where he fucked up though was 1) He wasn’t saying anything and wasn’t answering any questions (then again what can you really say?), 2) When his EX was pissed off enough to just leave, he wouldn’t let her. He kept closing the bedroom door on her. This of course infuriated his current girl! Can you blame her? Ahh… decisions, decisions.

His current girl decided to stay with him after all of this and Cee was grateful, he planned to drive in the right lane. But… (you saw that but coming didn’t you?) when his EX contacted him and told him that despite all the hurt he’s put her through she still loved him, my boy got seriously confused.

You know your Hustleman is a man of the people, I don’t pry into peoples business but if you bring it to me I’ll definitely listen. One day while he was over my house he decided to speak on the situation.

“I don’t know man… I’m confused.” Cee said with his head down. I immediately knew where he was coming from. I responded with a question to make sure I knew where he was at with this.

“You’re feeling them both aren’t you?”

Cee shook his head, “It’s like I see qualities I like in my girl and I see qualities I like in my EX.” He put his head down again to contemplate for a moment and then continued. “I don’t know man, it’s like I’m still feelin’ my ex-girl because we have history. I mean we practically grew up together. We never were in a relationship into we got older but really I guess she’s more my type.”

“You know man,” I said overstanding his confusion, “Life is about choices. You have to make a decision. The thing is with that, because of the situation that went down, when you make a decision you are going to have to leave the other one alone completely. You have to dead that shit. If you don’t, then you’ll lose them both.”

Cee nodded in agreement. “It’s just hard man…”

I went on, “I feel you brother but you’re still young and I don’t know what you’re looking for out of your life right now. If you want to lock it down with someone on some marriage type level then you need to be with the one that can offer that. Think in the long term. If you’re just fuckin’ right now then just do that. Find some girl you can do that with and leave them both alone. They’re hurting right now.”

I continued, “Regardless of your decision if you continue in a relationship with either of them it’s going to be hard. Once that trust is gone, you can’t get it back. They’ll always have that doubt in the back of their mind. I’ve been through that shit with my first fiancé, its stress on the real; you’re going to be under a microscope.”

We continued to talk for a few minutes and then let it go. We all live and learn and Cee needs to make his own mistakes.

Over the next couple of weeks things between Cee and his current girl were cool. But… (yes, another but) then Cee pulled another relationship felony out of the bag. Seems he took some clothes, took some condoms and was gone for over a day in a half. He wouldn’t answer his cell phone and never called home. It was simple to know what he was up to. It’s like he wanted to be caught, I mean he knew damn well that every condom in that house was accounted for. Women keep tabs on things like that.

He could have done it differently, but then again he made no effort to hide it. He has balls though, he came right back home when his current girl was there. He didn’t wait until she was at work or nothing. Can you say DRAMA? Ahh… decisions, decisions… and now it’s on his current girl to decide what she’s going to do. To be honest I think it’s going to remain business as usual. At least until she finds someone to replace him.

Eh… I could be wrong but time will tell now won’t it?

Peace and blessings Fam. May your upcoming week be filled with joy and success.

Be sure to tune in next week when I get back into the business talk with an eye-opening look at how a Hustler builds a business with next to nothing. See you then.

Torn?

Greetings Fam! I know it’s been awhile but just know your Hustleman is back at you. These last couple of weeks have been off the hook! There’s so much to catch you all up on it’s almost overwhelming, but to keep things simple (as I like to do), I’ll just cut to the chase and stick with the things that hit closest to home at the moment.

*** If you haven’t downloaded your FREE copy of “Wealth Programming and the Science of Getting Rich”, written by yours truly, then go ahead and get it now! I’m pulling the plug on this book on March 31st. To get your copy CLICK HERE. ***

Ahh, where to begin… well my main business is doing quite well; it continues to grow pretty much by itself. I’ll tell you Fam there’s no feeling quite like knowing that all your hard work and effort is paying off.

Also I’m in communication with a fellow Hustler who has a lot of experience and expertise to bring to the table. This young lady is already doing her thing as far as running seminars and doing a couple other businesses. If things go as planned, she and I will put a book together. This book will be much less “street” and more accessible to the public at large. I’ll let you know how that turns out; as of right now everything is still up in the air. Busy, busy, busy LOL. I’m not complaining mind you, I’m loving this shit.

The M2 project, my car dealership, is still rolling out although I’ve fallen a little behind schedule. I’ll be making an effort to pick up the pace a little so that by the summer of 2008 I should have that business profitable and locked down. There’s still so much to learn about the business and just know, I’m in it to win – to quote the rapper Jay-Z, “I will not lose”. I hope you feel me on that.

On a more personal note, dating has become much more complex and not only is it taking up a lot of my time, I also find myself torn between how to correctly divide up that time. I mean really Fam, it’s easy to balance my work and my social life but it’s really beginning to take a toll on me mentally; dealing with various personalities on a more intimate level is not that easy.

Sadly though, the young lady I grew closest too and was feeling the most is no longer at my side. Mz Chanel and I have decided not to go any further. She couldn’t deal with my current living situation. For those that don’t know, I still live with my ex-girlfriend. I know what you’re thinking LOL, you don’t have to say it.

I had to put some space in-between Mz Chanel and myself and try to look at our relationship from the outside; you know, take my emotions out of the picture. Sadly as much as I was feeling this woman I realized that there would be no peace between us as long as she refused to accept my situation. Which is her choice, I’m not knockin’ that.

I invited Mz Chanel over MANY, MANY times to come meet my ex and to see the situation first hand. Let’s be real, my living situation is far from normal and I could have been feeding her a line of bullshit from the start.

I accept that keeping things real is always the best policy so I told her don’t believe what I’m telling you, come see for yourself with your own eyes. No go though, she wouldn’t budge; she refused to come over the house, she refused to meet my ex and she refused to even overstand (stand over not under) why I choose to stay in my situation for the time being. Eh… what can I do? I hold nothing against her but in the end I figured it like this: If she cares anything about me, she would want to meet the people that I care about, follow me? These people are a part of my life and who doesn’t want to overstand their potential mate and that person’s life better?

I think any woman in their right mind would jump at the chance to see if what I’m saying is true. I know if the situation was reversed I would. As a matter of fact almost every woman I’ve dated had no problem coming through to check out the situation first hand and meet my ex. I’m not slow, I know there will always be a hint of doubt in the back of their minds but one thing they couldn’t say is that I lied or tried to hide something. Back on point…

Mz Chanel and I ended things off on a positive note. I genuinely cared about her and those feelings don’t go away over night. Plus she’s still good people and her two kids have a place in my heart. We talk almost everyday for a few minutes just to see how one another is doing and that’s about all. I’ll admit though, I do miss seeing her smile.

So I had to make a decision. Either I give all my time, attention and energy to my businesses or try to still be successful and have a meaningful relationship also. So you know me… the search for a good woman to put on my team continues. Only a mentally trapped person thinks either/or; a wise person realizes they can have both.

Although I have met a very interesting young lady recently that’s actually sparked my interest I’ve run into an unexpected dilemma… follow me on this if you would.

One of my homegirls who I’ll call Mz Tam called me up last weekend.

“Come over, I have to tell you about my night last night.”

“Really?” I asked, “What’s up, everything alright?” I could hear it in her tone. Normally Tam is what some folks would call a firecracker. High energy, always smiling always joking. But her tone was low energy, agitated, almost as if something happened that shook her up.

“Just come over, I just can’t be in the house right now, I just need to get away. Please just come get me.”

“Alright, no problem. Give me an hour, I need to shower and shave.”

I drove to her house knocked on the door. I was greeted by one of her daughters and looking up the stairs of her two-floor duplex I could see her at the top of the stairs, she waved and then disappeared. I made myself comfortable on the sofa as her two daughters watched some Barbie crap on the television.

After a few minutes Mz Tam came down the stairs and instead of being greeted by her usual smile I got a dry, “Hello”. She threw some things in her purse, grabbed her cell phone and said, “Let’s go.”

I begin to listen to her story about her adventures at an after hours club over in East Point. One of her cousins was in town and it was her last night there so they wanted to show her a good time. Her family frequented the club so they figured that was the best place to go.

According to Tam the club owner, who was drunk and acting like a dickhead, was basically fucking with her and her family the whole night. Subtle shit, like having someone take their drinks off the table and replacing it with glasses of water; having one of the bouncers telling them where they could and could not sit. There’s a lot more but I’m trying to keep this post as short as I can.

Fast forward… Mz Tam got a hotel room because she just wanted peace and quiet and needed to detox from all the alcohol and weed she smoked all night and all morning. We talked for a few minutes and she fell asleep. I left and picked up some food because I knew she would be hungry when she woke up.

Meanwhile, the young lady I’m currently getting to know, Mz Lonnie, is calling me. What am I supposed to say? I told the truth, I was with my homegirl Tam… in a hotel room… trying to listen to her and calm her down. Fortunately Lonnie overstood and just asked for me to keep her informed of the situation.

When Tam finally wakes up we eat and begin to talk. And I mean TALK, one of those deep conversations where you lose track of time. Now Fam, I’ve heard some of Tam’s stories before about her childhood and whatnot but this time she was letting everything out. I mean this girl was practically breaking down right infront of me. She was in tears as she reflected and told her tales.

Mz Lonnie called again. DAMN, lost track of time! I let her know I was still with Tam and I would get back at her ASAP. Long story short, I ended up spending the night at the hotel with Tam. This girl was shattered in pieces, it just didn’t seem right to leave her. I tried to build her up as best I could but sleep eventually took over.

Fast forward to Thursday night… I’m over Tam’s house and one of her friends from her hometown of Detroit in there with her husband. We sit and share some stories and they eventually leave. That’s when Tam dropped the bomb on me. It’s funny because I felt it coming, perhaps I even invited it to come. I mean I’m all about living in the moment (for the most part), but some things you can see coming and they can be avoided. That’s the thing though, I didn’t want to avoid this one.

It seems that our conversation at the hotel caused Tam to see me in a different light. This was true for me too, I felt much more connected to her. Not because she was crying her eyes out and I felt like I had to save her, but because she was so real with how she was feeling and how what she went through made her a stronger and much wiser person today.

We talked about how we felt and my eyes couldn’t help but notice her smooth chocolate legs and how short her shorts were she was wearing. I’m a man, what can I say? One thing led to another and the next thing I know I’m in the bathroom washing myself off in the sink. I sat with her for another hour and then made my way back home. Friday was around the corner and I knew I had to prepare myself for Friday grind. And add to that the fact that I also need to keep things clear between Mz Lonnie and myself.

Mz Lonnie is feeling your Hustleman, and without a doubt I’m feeling her too… but I’m not here to hurt anyone so I had to tell her the truth. That’s right; I told her what happened between me and Tam. Besides, I accept the fact that what goes around comes around, so why bullshit and be deceitful? Lying takes up too much time and energy I don’t have. I’m a man with integrity and principles; I won’t be anything less.

Mz Lonnie took the news like a real woman. She overstood the situation and realized my slight confusion; for the moment I’m torn and I need to make a decision. The things I get myself into…

Well I’ll wrap this up here Fam this post is way too long. Thank you all for being patient with me and as always I wish everyone much success and prosperity. Peace and blessings and I’ll be back at you as soon as possible. I’ll try not to stay away too long this time.