Sunday Reflection: The One Man Army And The Enemy Within

Much love Fam! The weathers getting a little cool outside but it's nothing to a brother who's already cool inside feel, me? LOL, anyhow hope this reaches who it needs to reach and I hope all of you are blessed and feeling fabulous! This has been an oddly slow week for some reason, I'm not trippin' but being on the block already tired from lack of sleep and then standing around bored as hell is not a good combination. Anyway onto the reflection for this Sunday...

I'm an entrepreneur by heart, I mean ever since I was 15 I've always wanted to run my own thing. This was mainly due to the FREEDOM factor. Freedom of time, movement and choice. Since I stated working at this age (my first job was only 3 hours a day) I immediatley knew that working for someone else wasn't going to be my thing. I also used to watch my father's determination on trying to get something started for himself. He never did it, but he was always brain-storming and coming up with plans. Somehow this rubbed off on me, and on top of that it's just in my blood. My father's side of the family is head strong and extremely goal-oriented. This of course comes from my grandparents. My grandfather was in the military and my grandmother is true old school. Can you say discipline people!

When I first started hustling I remember having that inner fear that perhaps I was wasting my time and would end up failing. I started... well tried to start, about 3 business prior to what I'm doing now and they all failed. There's like this little voice in your head that's determined to undermine your focus and offer you the "easy" way out. And that easy out is non-action. Just going back to doing what you're comfortable with and being content with the bullshit. I finally pushed past that and well, whaddaya know? After some ups and downs I can stand up with pride I say, "Yeah I did it! And I'm never going back!".

I often sit and think about my journey and my struggle and realize that I'm about to do it all again. Starting a business is not easy. Just on the work I'm putting in right now to get this new thing up and running is crazy! I'm missing sleep, I'm networking, I'm writing, I'm web designing, I'm making marketing plans, writing ads you name it, I'm doing it. I'm a one man army blasting through obstacles and advancing. And here comes that little voice, "Is all this effort worth it? What if I fail? Will I be taken seriously?" It's funny because after all I've been through that annoying voice is still with me. I think that's with everyone and often times that voice wins.

So here it is from your Hustleman: If you are on a path and you are doing something you accept is the best for you, tell that voice to shut the hell up and get the fuck on! Keep moving, keep pushing and make your way to your goal! Don't listen to that voice, or anyone else's voice for that matter if it's not positive. If you succeed then so be it. If you fail, then you have just learned how NOT to do something. Failure is only accepting defeat. Success is finding a way to make things work and continuing to do it, and do it to death.

I appreciate all the love and positive encouragement from the blog Fam (and you lurkers out there who don't comment -- I love you all too, keep coming through) and the people closest to me. Rest assured when I get to where I'm going I'll give you all the blueprint so you can build your own success (if that's what you're after). Black people need to learn how to appreciate and assist one another, we are the only race that doesn't do that. Its that famous "crab in a barrel" theory always rearing its ugly head. It's deep (yes Nici I said "deep" lol). Time for a change, don't you agree? And if any of you out there can share some business game with a brother, I'm all ears. I'm always learning so I can grow. And if you have some questions about the game yourself, hit your Hustleman up. Be well Fam and as the god would say, "Don't throw in the towel until there's nothing left to throw in BUT the towel." That's what's up.

Shots out to Mz Mo - Do your thang girl I got your back!

Keep it moving and keep it simple - if they only knew

Quick Update: Reflection On The Rebirth

What's good Fam? Your Hustleman is doing great! Life is good and things are moving. Sadly this must be the death of Shai, my "street handle" if you will. As I launch fully into the M1 project I have to make a rebirth to what all this Hustlin' and business knowledge has given me to this date. The new name is James W. Dennis, author and consultant. It's time to pass the Game to the world... well at least to those that want it.

As I still bob and weave through the concrete jungle until my new business takes off, I have to constantly remind myself that everything grows and changes and that includes people. When you begin something new you have to be prepared to let the old things go. Mixing old and new is like planting weeds in your garden, it will eventually kill the beauty.

Fear not, I'm still the hustleman you know, just new and improved! Overall the Game's been good to me and I have had the chance to talk and walk with some of the slickest most intelligent people you could ever meet. The things they showed me, told me and taught me help shape the person I am today. It's time to take all of that knowledge and do something with it. Honestly, knowledge without using it is just well... useless information, feel me? As always, much love Fam and I'll return to you soon.

Keep it moving and keep it simple - if they only knew

The M1 Project And Updates

Fam! What's good with you? Your Hustleman has returned and the grind is on me big time. I've literally have slept about 18 hours in the last 4 days but I'm actually feeling pretty good. Also I apologize to the Blog Fam for not checking in with your posts I've just been crazy busy. I'll be making my way around today for sure. The pic above is of the overcast days we've been having lately as fall rolls in. Saturday was beautiful though and today is just as nice. If I had more time on my hands I would have done something big. There's no Sunday Reflection today but I figured I could at least up date you about what's going on with me and around me.

1) The M1 Project:
As you all know this whole blog is dedicated to my journey towards accomplishing my goal of making my first million. So all my lack of sleep lately has been straight work on editing and setting up my website and finishing up my first project. Much respect to all the web designers out there, I never realized how difficult that shit really is. And my website isn't even what you would call super "professional". Design is just not my thing but it's something I need to practice so I took it upon myself to do it myself.

The M1 Project is my first step (1) towards my million (M). When everything is up and running as it should be I'll definitely put you all on to the site and give more details as to what you Hustleman has gotten into. My "live" launch date is set for the 15th of November so if no major problem arise, it should be ready to go by then. I'm excited to say the least, I've been wanting to do this for about 4 years now. Laziness and fear had caught the best of me but I'm on top of it now.

2) Things at home:
From my last post all of you know that me and my lady of 2 years have parted ways. Everything is good and we are still getting along as usual. No uncomfortableness or odd moments so it's all good. The love of course is still there and it's nice to know we still have each others backs, feel me?

3) The return of New York:
New York has returned to "The A"! He had hit his lotto number and went home for awhile to visit family. I saw him Thursday as he pulled up in his brand new 06 PT Cruiser sittin' on chrome wheels. He was sportin' a fresh hair cut (he said he wasn't going to cut it until he hit his number) and actually had a smile on his face. It was good to see the brother I admit. The spot is kind of dull without him.

We didn't have much time to talk but he did let me know that everything with him is good. He's investing more into his business and will hopefully have things up and runing soon. The car was paid for in cash and that's just inspirational to me. I love seeing my people do well, it get's me back on my grind even harder.

4) New up and comer to the blog 'verse:
Big love to Mz Nici Nicole who will soon be starting her blog here on blogger. This is a good friend of mine and I'm sure you all will love her perspectives and insights. When she's ready, I'll make the announcement and pass on the link to you all.

5) Bad judgement:
I was at my spot working recently and I saw one of my homegirls. Her eyes were red and her spirit just looked broken. She told me that she finally had confirmation that what she suspected was true. Her man was cheating on her. Her man's other woman got her cell number and sent her a very detailed set of text messages which broke my homegirl's heart.

Here's my issue. My homegirl is from a pretty well to do family, she's attractive, intelligent and educated. Yet, she's running around with this bum ass drug dealin' dude who has nothing to offer her. They argue constantly, he checks on her like he doesn't trust her. He doesn't keep his word or commitments, you get my point. Maybe the dick is good, I don't know, but I can't put 2 and 2 together. The best thing I could tell her was to just stop settling on bullshit. Life's too short for it. And on top of that, this dude is sub-standard, at least that's my perspective. I've seen him a few times and he always gives me that "hater" look. I guess because his girl and I have conversations. The heart wants what it wants I guess, but I think it's just bad judgement. Maybe my female readers can hit me to something I'm missing. Why all the settling for bad relationships? I've been hearing this regularly lately. Anyway...

All in all life is good, no stress just blessed. Keeping it moving and keeping it simple in the process. Thanks to everyone who takes the time to read this that means alot to me. I'm still in grind mode so be patient with me, I'll try to keep the posts as regular as possible. Be good Fam and stay on your grind out there. Life is full of opportunites if your eyes are open, with that being said, remember not all opportunities are right for you.

All Good Things Must...

Greeting Fam! It's your Hustleman once again on the grind. It was kind of dreary and overcast today, but it was hot as hell. Most definitely the humidity. The sun even made a couple of quick appearances. I had a picture for today's post, but since Blogger is fucking with me as usual, it won't let me upload any images right now, I'll have to do this without one. Things are looking up on the hustle tip, but there has been a great loss to the team. The 16th of this month (technically the 11th) was the 2 year anniversary of my girl and I. Now before you start cheering and carrying on let me explain something to you.

This 2 year mark also was a time of reflection, you know, a review of the relationship up to this point. Since my lady has been in a state of self-awareness and growth it was only natural that she would finally decide what makes her happy and what she really wants out of life; and that doesn't include a relationship with me, fair enough.

The overall decision wasn't completely one-sided, I felt things had reached their height between us too. If the relationship isn't going anywhere, and there's nothing to hold on to, then why hold on?

Last night was the night we agreed to celebrate and we were out to do just that. A nice stop at Red Lobster (I love that seafood), and then a movie. A simple night out, nothing extravagant, alot of my money is going to get my new business up and running so I was ballin' on a budget, feel me?

After dinner it was time for the movie, since we couldn't find the movie we wanted to see because the theatre we went to seems to not be able to keep up with the movie game, we made our way back to the hood to hit up Magic Johnson Theatres. And it was on that ride that we both realized that this just wasn't working.

We talked in depth about where we should go now. Which is one reason I have love for my lady *cough* ex-lady, she doesn't live in the past too much, she likes to deal with now and the future.

Now there is no hard feelings, or even hurt feelings over this matter which is all good. We both just had to come to terms with the reality of the situation. We still agreed to have each others back and since we have always gotten along so well together we're trying to keep the friendship alive. To be real, the friendship was probably the strongest aspect of our relationship, which is how it should be.

I'll admit, it feels a little odd being a single man again after 2 years (again, oddly this was my longest relationship), but it is what it is. You know your Hustleman will keep it moving and keep it simple in the process.

Break ups can be rough but if you're both on some grown-up shit, things usually have a way of working out in the post relationship. So back to the grind and more focus on doing what I do. Back to the basics.

So what's up with the dating scene in the future? Hmm, you might have to miss me on that one for a minute. The dating scene is a trip and requires alot of time and patience. Patience I have if I don't feel like my time is being wasted, but it's alot of time I don't have to spare. That being said, I feel that everyday of this past 2 year was worth it. The good times far exceed the bad. If I had to do it again, then no problem. In the end her and I are just on seperate pages. But that's life isn't it? We all learn and grow and make decisions, it just so happens not everyone is headed in the same direction at the same time as youself.

And that's what's up Family. As always, much love to you all and thanks for stopping by. I'll do my best to return to you before Sunday Reflection but the grind is on me something serious right now. So until next time, peace! Keep it moving and keep it simple. Tomorrow is always a new day.

Sunday Reflection: Back To Simplicity

Family what's good with ya? It's your Hustleman back for another Sunday Reflection. For my new readers this is my official off day of the week. I try not to do anything major. Just catch up on a few things, especially rest and relaxation. Facing burn out syndrome over the past week or so I've decided to ease up a bit on things but I'm still here with you. The weekend was uneventful, which was good. I'm just trying to conserve energy right now and stay focused. Overall this week went by so fast, I looked up and it was Saturday! Anyhow, how did your week go? As usual, I hope all is well with you.

After a conversations with Mz Nici Nicole on my burn out feelings, she actually helped me to remember how many hats I wear per day. I mean seriously we all do. In one day we can be employees, managers, bosses, parents, friends, wife or husband, girlfriend or boyfriend, students, teachers, counselors, daughters or sons, and so on and so on... you get my point.

The reason this is so interesting to me, as it has always been, is because alot of people switch roles (or hats) in their life and don't give it a second thought. When I began hustling I made it a point to create a new role for myself. One dedicated to making a profit. Often times though I do forget to take this hat off so to speak.

I mean seriously, I encompass so many roles throughout my day that I'm beginning to realize that I have broken one of my own rules. It's amazing how someone can help you realize something you've overlooked isn't it? That broken rule is to keep things simple. I'm doing a little too much and that within itself isn't the problem. I have plenty of time to do everything I need to do, but I haven't kept all the things I do simple. I'm pretty sure some of you out there have this same problem. Life is in fast forward and we are always playing catch up.

So what am I going to do about it? Well first I'm going to look at what needs adjusting (which will probably be everything), and then set about to streamline what I do, when I do it and how I do it. Sounds easy, but often times easy things aren't, feel me? Our time is a tool and a great equalizer. Everyone has the same amount given per day. And how we use it determines where we'll end up and what we'll become.

Anyone who knows me, knows I hate wasting time. So thanks to this wisdom that's been found again I can get myself back on track and possibly prevent fututre burn out effects. I'm telling you Fam, just to sit back with a pen and paper and track how you spend your time will shock the hell out of you. And if you're a person that's constantly in motion like myself, you'll realize that you spend more time doing the least important things. I'm not sure how this happens but it's life gone wild, it's out of order so I'm making the necessary adjustments.

In the meantime, the roles we all play in life should also be paid attention too. Are you stuck in a role that isn't adding to the value of your life? Or perhaps you spend a little too much time in a role when other things in your life need a little attention too? I honestly accept that many relationships and marriages deteriorate or end because of this reason. Little attention into the relationship role and more into everything else. Just an observation, leave a comment and let me know what you think about the subject. I'm curious.

So Fam, life is truly a great teacher, if you're a good student. Your Hustleman is still learning and growing as we all are. And all in all, it's a beautiful thing. Much love Fam keep it moving and keep it simple. That's my new motto. Be back with you all soon.

A Hustleman Introspection: Enemy Of The Soul

Greetings to the Family out there! As always, I hope all is well with you. Blogger has been fuckin' with me lately so I'm trying to sort that out. Anyway a few quick updates before we get on with today's post.

1) I've been tired as hell lately and haven't been too inspired to write much. I've turned down my hustle a notch because I feel burnout coming. So, instead of going 199% like usual I'm just doing a 100%, feel me? If I get burned out then I won't be doing shit so I'm making efforts to avoid that.

2) Good news from the block! New York has finally hit his lotto number! He said this was his month and sure enough it was. He hit it Tuesday night and is currently out of town in... New York (you saw that coming right?) Needles to say he hit it big time so I'm very happy for him. He even came through to show your Hustleman some love last night before he left out this morning. It wasn't even necessary but that's how New York is. Much love to him and I hope his trip goes well.

3) The current status of my hateration fan club seems to have calmed down a little bit. It's all good, I know they're lurking in the shadows somewhere. I see you sucka ass bitches. You can't hide too long, you have hating to do, so get to work! Anyway moving on...

I wrote the draft of this post in the early morning. You know... one of those nights when your mind is full of thoughts and suddenly a moment of clarity hits you. Well if you all would allow me, here I go again on another introspection which I would like to share.

Here it is: The fear of loss is quite possibly the greatest motivator known to us human beings. When things look their worst, we often times wait to the last minute to make our move. Usually because only then do we realize that we are about to lose something valuable to us. I've lost many things in my life from relationships, to money, to material possessions and more and each and every time I learned something in the process. As I get older I'm beginning to realize that fear is almost always the wrong motivation to move on. When we move in fear we move in error most of the time. We were not made to live out of fear but out of courage.

If you can go back and look at all your accomplishments throughout your life, the ones that probably stand out the most are the ones that took effort, work and the general idea of just "fuck it"! You knew you may not have gotten the results you wanted, but you went ahead. You pushed fear aside and moved forward anyway. Moving despite fear and doubt is power in its truest sense. We all fear many things, but if you let that stop you or determine what you do and how you do it, you are doing nothing but dimming your soul, you're hurting your own growth.

It's been said that human beings move (make decisions) because of 2 main factors. 1) The fear of loss and 2) the desire for gain. But on some levels, even the desire to gain something is fear based. Most of what we desire is to keep us from feeling the pain of losing something. It can be as simple as the desire to be secure. If you desire to feel secure, you actually fear losing what you have, feel me?

It's a sad reality but we have been programmed to respond to fear. We have let it control our lives. And then we wonder why many of us live mundane and stressful lives. We stopped living "our" life along time ago. Now we only live a shadow of a healthy existence. We are living someone elses life. Even the very act of paying a bill is to keep us from losing something which we need. The subtle programming is deep Fam.

Now, realistically, we can never fully live without doing things to keep us from loss. But we can make efforts to do things that will get us closer to what WE want (not what THEY tell us we should want). Fear of loss and the desire for gain are like two boxers, evenly matched and equally strong. The one that wins depends entirely on you and your choices. And isn't that what life boils down to? Making decisions and being prepared to deal with the outcome whatever it may be. Everyone seeks their own results.

One of my mentors (yes I've had alot of them :P) once said this. A criminal who lives fearlessly has a better chance of success and becoming "great" (I use that term loosely) than the "good" person who lives cautiously. It has nothing to do with what's right and wrong, it all has to do with the way they look at life and how far they're willing to go to get what they want. I'm not advocating criminal activity, but I'm trying to make this clear. We do things out of fear almost automatically, but when it comes to doing things that will get us closer to our goals and happiness, we hesitate, procrastinate or just drop it all together. Fear not though Fam, we have all been programmed with this shit and it can all be deprogrammed if we're willing to take the necessary steps.

As always, thanks for reading. These are just some of the thoughts that run through the head of your Hustleman from time to time as I continue to commit myself to stay focused and get what I feel I deserve. Peace and blessings. Take care out there Family!

Sunday Reflection: The Collection Of Hateration

How goes it Family! As life rushes past us, I hope you're enjoying every moment that you possibly can. Now me, myself, I'm doing good. It's another Sunday, so I'm doing my best to relax and recharge although there is always work to be done, feel me? It was one of my "sorta" god daughters Birthdays yesterday and I kind of feel bad that I had to miss her party. It's small things like this which make me realize that the grind is real, almost addictive in a way. I enjoy what I do and I have responsibilities to take care of so I had to take care of that. It's amazing how, at times, your business can run you instead of the other way around.

A quick update from Friday's post. Mel is out and about! I saw him yesterday at my spot and he was talking much trash. I didn't expect to see him until next week, but the charge he got was such bullshit they let him go the next morning. According to his side of the story, he never walked into the grocery store but was forced to go in when an undercover came from behind him and pointed him out to the new store manager, a black woman, who agreed that he was definently criminal trespassing. His view was that he and the new manager woman never even had a conversation. She's never said anything to him about anything so why the hell fuck with him for no apparent reason just out of the blue? True or not true I don't know, but it does seem as though there is an unseen force of haters trying to maneuver things. Which brings me to the topic of this post.

Now your Hustleman has always had to deal with haters. I collect them like Jordan collected championship rings. They come in all shapes, sizes and colors but they all share a common thread. They just don't like me for whatever reason and I know they silently wish for my down fall. Now, I don't floss diamonds, I rarely put on my crisp new gear unless I'm going out for a night on the town, the vehicle I ride in is definently not an escalade or anything in that price range, so I came to the conclusion that they can't hate on me for the way I look or my material possessions (cause I only floss on my off days). They hate me, what I do and what I represent.

Hustlers like myself live in a world just under yours. The underworld as they call it. We have our own rules, laws and regulations that your average person won't take the time to understand. We don't live into the ideals of what's normal and accepted. We don't work like they work, we don't play like they play, we don't stress about what they stress about. We're really free spirits, mainly because we have a control over our life that the normal (square) people don't have or are afraid to get. To make it simple, Huslters are proactive, the squares are reactive. We make things happen so we can make moves. They wait for things to happen and then decide what move to make. They honestly feel that because of this mentality that they are right and we are wrong. And we feel the same way, we're right and they're wrong. I guess it's that Ying Yang thing, two opposite forces and one force always has to be stronger sooner or later.

I like to look at it like the movie "The Matrix". The haters are the agents who work for the system. You never know quite who they are, but they can come at you at anytime so you have to make your moves and keep in mind that they're out there somewhere.

Now it seems that the same plain clothes undercover cop that got Mel in a twist has a hard-on for your Hustleman and New York. I say hard-on because he wants to fuck us, feel me? I've never seen or spoke to this dude, ever. But it seems he just doesn't like what we do. Mel told me about this dudes intentions because he overheard a conversation undercover was having with the Fulton County officer when they came for him Friday. I just shook my head and mentally formulated a plan of action. Haters like this can be a thorn in your side, so I need to confront him, before he confronts me. Normally I let haters just do what they do, but when it comes to haters in law enforcement, sometimes you need to talk to them straight up and see just what the hell their problem is. Funny thing about all this is that if he could have done anything, he would have done it already and since that grocery store is part over my overall territory, I know damn near everyone in there and around there. With a couple questions and a phone call I know what this dude looks like, his work schedule and I have one of the employees inside the store watching him for me. It pays to show love to the people.

I hate drama, especially drama in my spot and drama that will effect my wallet, but I don't run from it either. All of this is a constant reminder to me that it's about time for your Hustleman to elevate off this street level game. Hell, I even have crackheads hating on me, what the fuck is up with that? But it's all good, I keep it moving. People only hate on you when they see you doing something or looking like something special. To have a few haters in your life is a sign that you're actually doing pretty well (or at least look like it). No one has ever accomplished anything great without gathering haters along the way. It is what it is. Anyhow thanks for stopping by Fam as always and remember, the haters are watching so let them do their job. Dodge them and get yours. Peace!

A Fools Error

Peace Fam what's up with ya? The pic above is one of your Hustleman's favorite Jamaican eating places. It's in College Park on Old National Highway. New York knows damn near everybody so we stepped through tonight to check out a few of his people. The day itself was fabulous. It started out a little rough because I left from the house late whch means I almost missed my connect to get my merchandise for the day. Luckily I caught him just as I was leaving the area, if not, then I would have wasted about an hour just to catch back up with this dude later today. In anything dealing with business, time is money and I don't like to waste it.

The vibe was laid back today, I can't quite put it into words but it was one of those days where you just felt good. Alot of my regular clientele came through to show love and I had to leave to pick New York up and bring him to the spot. His boy ran his Chevy Caprice into the ground so New York is without his transportation. It's all good though, he's a stand up type dude so I have no problem looking out for him. We talked about his lotto gambling habit (now up to about $100 a day if I hadn't mentioned it already), and how he's hustling backwards. He knew I spoke the truth but he's not ready to hear it just yet. He's claims this is his month to "hit" so he's focused on that big time, no surprise there.

The day ran smooth, money flowed and we did the regular bullshitting about life, females, money and business. Coming through was also one of the local crackheads. Let's just call him Mel. He's a crackhead but he's not the normal type, feel me? This dude hustles. He washes cars, clean floors in stores around the neighborhood and is generally a good person. I don't kick it around him much because one, he's a crackhead and two, he's a thief. He steals from stores in the area and sells to the public for a low price. As far as I know he's never stole from anybody personally so I'm cool with him, but not that cool. He used to help Mike the Hustler out (remember him?) ... speaking of which, I haven't seen Mike all week... anyway he came at your Hustleman today in need of a little cash. Now, he doesn't beg for his money he likes to work for it, so as hesitant as I was I thought I would help him out. I threw him some merchandise and told him what I needed back money wise and he could keep the rest of the profit.

New York and I were in grind mode big time and that's when I got the word, someone was arrested inside the nearby grocery store. New York was quick with the analysis. "Yo, you seen your man?", I thought for a second and asked for clarification, "Who?" I asked. New York was asking about Mel. I thought for a second and flashed back to the last time I saw him, he was at the grocery store parking lot. Why would he go into the grocery store? He's literally banned from stepping a foot in the door. His reputation in that store is that of a thief, what sense would that make?

Now let's pause here. Knowing who and what this dude is you would think I would have thought a little harder about the situation before I set him up with merchandise to sell. But I couldn't come up with a reason to justify me not helping him. I mean seriously, everyone knows him and has respect for him. He's never stressed me about anything so why not help him out? It was a win - win deal looking at it business wise. And from another perspective you would probably say I'm supporting his habit by lettting him make money to feed it, and yes, I considered that too.

I shook my head and figured it was time for a little investigation. I walked into the grocery store and talked to one of the managers. And she confirmed what I already knew to be true. Damn! Why the hell would he come into the store? That was just... well, stupid. And there was nothing I could do. I don't give a damn about the merchandise I lost, but I felt bad because I don't like seeing any of my people locked up.

Sure enough after about an hour Fulton County PD came for him and New York and I just looked at each other. Wow, you have to charge that one to the game. And the game doesn't stop so we just kept grinding until there was hardly anymore foot traffic. After the grind I drove New York to Jamaica Jamaica so he could talk to his people, then on to his weed man and dropped him at home. A few phone calls came through for your Hustleman... still more work to do.

All in all it was another great Friday and hopefully Mel will be out and about by Tuesday if he didn't steal anything, so that's all good. Amazing... what the hell happened to common sense? One error in judgement and your whole day, week or life can change. I took mental notes and learned a lesson even if Mel didn't.

Much love Fam. Stay up, enjoy your weekend safely and I'll be back at your for Sunday Reflection. Peace!

Inflow / Outflow: A Rant From Your Hustleman

What's good Family! Your Hustleman is doing well, it's coming into fall but it was hot as hell today. I recently had a chance to go through Adamsville and Bankhead and that's the pic up there. I haven't been through there in a while and not much has changed (does the hood ever really change?). It was slow motion on my grind today but I still came out fabulous. So if you all don't mind I need to get some things off my chest and writing it is always a good release for me, so if you're with it here we go.

~(WARNING!!! Rant Coming Up)~ I can't call it Fam. It seems as though over the last 2 months the "associate" energy around me has been crazy. Some people left, others have come in. It's no big deal though because I only really have 4 friends, so the associates are no big deal. It does bother me though that some of them don't have the common courtesy to at least say, "Hey Shai, fuck you!" I know I can be an asshole, but really, I'm focused and play time is over. Now these associates have been both male and female but I only feel like writing about the females, it's more interesting, trust me.

Example one, take for instance Mz Hershey. Ex-porno star from Cali going through some hard times. As my associate slash homegirl, I figured at least I could speak with her every so often and try to keep her spirits up. But no, sorry, not going to help you with the money, I have my own home and business to take care of. Besides she has like 4 dudes she messes with just for that purpose. I was just there for moral support and to try to drop some jewels (knowledge) on her so she won't get discouraged and start going backwards. She was always a woman of her word. If she said something she did it. But wouldn't you know it... rest of the story short, I haven't heard from her in about 3 weeks. I made attempts to call and was met with, "I'll call you back later. I promise." That call back never happened. I charged it to the game, maybe she was possibly tying to do some slick shit and set your Hustleman up for something and it didn't work out. Or perhaps I wasn't there for her in the capacity she felt I should have been (whatever that was). All good though, you know I keep it moving.

Next up is my "maybe baby mama". This is a good one... I'll give you the short version. Supposedly she had my child (a baby boy) a little over 3 years ago. Now as hard as I've tried to see this kid, it never happened. All I wanted was to see him, if there was a resemblance then we could do the blood test thing, feel me? I know she was out there with other dudes, she was never really my woman so hey, I'm not mad at that.

Now at first we used to verbally fight over the phone about this issue; she was back and forth between Georgia and Florida at the time. And still to this day I've never seen this kid. I've never heard him over the phone. Occasionally "maybe baby mama" and I cross paths and since I made an effort to pretty much ignore her (mainly because I think she's a psycho bitch), instead of the look of hate she used to give, she smiles, waves and says "Hi!". Then she gets in the SUV with her girlfriend (and I do mean girlfriend). Funny thing is, I probably see her about 2 to 3 times a month and I never see her with a kid. Hmmm... Now, I never wanted to be a bum ass dude when it came to my little big heads but come on Fam! Does she even really have a kid? I stopped feeding into that shit a year ago and of course now she wants to make nice and make herself seen. Have to blame myself here, should have chosen a more stable and intelligent woman to lay down with. Lesson learned.

Next female in question... My current girl and I are on rocky terms. Together almost 2 years (2 years on the 11th of this month)and we have come to the conclusion that although we have love for one another, we're really not "in" love with one another. I overstand (over, not under) that and I respect that. The thing in this situation though is the fact that she's really just getting to know herself. So as that happens I know she will change, and the things she's looking for in life will change. I'm trying to help her along since I've been there and done that, but I really feel as though some of her friends are really stunting her growth. All her female friends have issues and drama. Relationship drama, familiy drama, self-esteem issues, you get my point. And she's the one they turn too. She has answers for everyone but herself. We live together and I have love for her so I'm here for her, at least until she makes up her mind on what she wants.

I usually don't like things like this up in the air cause I'm a planner, I like to think a few moves ahead, but with matters of the heart and with emotions involved, it makes it a little more difficult to move around. So here I am in relationship limbo... how the hell did this happen?

So as the time for the beginning of my new business venture draws near, things around your Hustleman are in a whirlwind. It's cool though, I'm centered and standing like a mighty oak (although I am a little annoyed). It's all good though. When one thing leaves, another thing takes it's place. It's amazing the distractions that come when you're down to stay focused on something. It's kinda funny actually. Ah well.. enough rant from me. Be well Family and stay up. I'll be back at you soon.

P.S. Shots out to Mz Nici Nicole - I see you babygirl, things will get better, be patient. Better to have found out now rather than later. You know I'm here for ya. And to Mz Yolanda - Glad to see that smile back on your face now that your man is back from his bid. You held him down during his weakest moment, that's some real grown woman shit right there. I respect that greatly, much love to ya both.

Sunday Reflection: Now, Not Then

Peace and blessings Family! Sorry about the late Sunday Reflection. I've been so busy grindng, writing and researching for my next business move that I honestly had to really take a break and let my mind relax a bit. This past week has been very good. I must say that I'm not stressed just blessed. I was able to spend some time with my "sorta" god daughter little Kayla today. She always brings a smile to my face. And I also stopped through to check out the god and the goddess. It's nice to know that things with them are getting back on track. Back on topic...

I'm a people watcher so when I see these people walking around like they're dead (the living dead) it makes me think back to my days of frustration and semi-depression. You know those days when it seemed as though things would never get better so you had better just settle in and get comfortable. It's been said that pressure busts pipes. I've felt pressure, but I've never busted. Certain people are built for certain things (or can build themselves for certain things), my thing is making complicated things as simple as possible. I hate complication more than I hate drama.

People spend the majority of their day "in their heads". And this is a scary place to be for some of us. We all think about our fears and insecurities, what we don't have and what we can't do. Then there are optimistic people who try to focus on the positive. What they are trying to go, what type of person they want to be, achieving their goals and just enjoying life. But with all this "thinking" comes a price, you miss the oh so important moment of "now". Don't misread me, everyone should have goals and alot can be said for the power of positive thinking, but if you constantly think about the past, or focus so much on your future, then what the hell are you doing now?

Steve Harvey put it like this. The past belongs to history, the future belongs to the Heavenly Father, but the gift you have now, is called the present. So will you open your gift?

All of us fall in the time trap. We live in a world where everything is fast fast fast. People want results and people want them now. But when it comes to your life, and just enjoying it, we don't pay attention to our now because we are off to something else. When was the last time you actually watched a sunset or sunrise? When was the last time you we're with your special someone and just sat in silence to ejoying each other company? When was the last time you just stopped and gave yourself a moment to think? And I'm not talking about thinking about your bills and problems (or other peoples problems), I'm talking about thinking about the moment? How blessed you are to be able to breathe and having a place to lay your head at night. Even if it's not the best.

Don't be a victim of a get it "now" society. Wanting everything (material things) "now" but losing your personal now. Make your personal now all that you can make it. Give gratitude where it's due and let the people you love know that you love them. They may not be here tomorrow, so do it now.

I've been in some fucked up situations in my life and I'm very thankful for where I'm at now. As I work to make my future better I try to stop at least once a day and enjoy the now, and check myself to make sure I'm making the most of every moment. If you can constantly make the most of every moment you will reap the rewards of a fulfilling and beautiful life.

Just wanted to share that with you Fam. Many of the females I've been with in my past called me complicated because I think like this but also thrive in the depressed backdrop that is the city streets. I just used to say, I'm not complicated at all. I'm a simple dude. It's not what's going on around you that makes you who you are. It's what's going on inside and how you deal with what's going on around you that makes you who you are. Feel me? Anyhow be well Fam and take care until next time.